Wednesday, 12 July 2017

Five tips on surviving a long distance relationship

For those of you who don't know, Ben and I started our relationship in different states. He was in Albury, I was in Brisbane and it was a REALLY hard yet REALLY beautiful way to start our relationship. It actually started this day exactly three years ago (12 July)!



Beautiful because you get to know each other on a level you never think possible. Being a part from each other allows you to explore one another in the deepest way possible. You talk about everything and no topic is off limits.

Hard, because, well you can't be with them. You can't hold them, you can't kiss them and you can't do all of the things you want to do with the one you love.

It was really hard for us and without going in to too much detail, at one point, we gave up. We gave in to the hard and we stopped focusing on the things that were holding us together. Of course, a few months later, we realised how stupid we were to let what we had go.

A long distance relationship takes even more work than you could ever think. Ben and I have put together some tips that helped us get through the super hard times. I hope they can help you if you ever find yourself in a long distance relationship.


COMMUNICATE

This kind of ties in with trust. You cannot trust someone who doesn't communicate with you! You really have to be completely transparent with each other. Going out, tell them, going to a party, tell them. Feeling annoyed with something they did? Tell them, straight up. Don't let it build up to something. I really learned during this to just express how I feel straight away. It gets fixed straight away, and generally the other person will be able to make you feel better by explaining their actions or understanding how you feel and acknowledge they did something wrong. Then you can move on.

TRUST

If you cannot 100% trust the person you're in a long distance with, IT WILL NOT WORK and you need to leave right now because you're just opening yourself, and the other person in to a life of hell pretty much. Right from the beginning, I trusted Ben 100% and that's what made it work. We trusted each other and in a long distance relationship, it's all you can do is trust that they are doing everything right by you.

BE INTIMATE

Yep. It's a must. And yes, it's a different kind of intimate but its a beautiful one none the less. It's an important part of any relationship and even more important to stay connected when you're so far away. 

STAY BUSY

This is a must. You cannot be waiting in bed waiting for calls from them. Go out. Live your life. Ben and I would still go out with friends each weekend and go to the gym once or twice a day to keep busy. If your mind is constantly on the other person, you'll go crazy. Find a hobby, make something, do anything and everything and enlist the help of all of your friends to get through it. 

TALK EVERY DAY

Now this isn't always possible, especially if your partner is in the Army like Ben was. He went away a few times for work and although we couldn't speak and he didn't have his phone on him, I would still send him messages each day just telling him about my day. It really helps. Even if you only speak for five minutes, that five minutes will be the highlight of your day. 


Have you been in a long distance relationship before? How did you make it work?


Keep smiling!

Tahana x

14 comments :

  1. Love this post, you two are so cute! I've never been in a long distance relationship, but I feel these should be applied to almost any relationship, they are great tips! Xx

    Kez | acaciasdreams.com

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    Replies
    1. Oh thank you lovely! I agree. Definitely needs to be applied to any relationship. It just took so much more focus when we were so far apart haha.

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  2. I love this post! I am lucky at the moment that my partner lives nearby but he is meant to be going to UK soon to study, so I might need some of these tips!

    Laura || www.thelifeoflaura.com.au xx

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    Replies
    1. Definitely keep them handy! It will be tough! <3

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  3. Me and my now hubby did two years of long distance and its not easy at all. This would be great help for young love starting a long distance..must read

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  4. Wonderful post xx Cant be easy at all.

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  5. Firstly, Happy three years anniversary! You both look so cute together. Some great tips, me and my husband were in long distance relationship for few years and i can totally relate to your points.

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  6. The longest long distance relationship I had was 6 months, then I asked him to come home to me. Since then, we've never been apart. Long distance relationships are hard for me and I'm happy for some of my friends who have held theirs for 7 years! Thanks for these tips! xx

    Jacq
    jacqwritesworld.blogspot.com.au

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  7. Fair play,this is so hard to do! I tried it with a partner who was FIFO and I wished it had worked out but it wasn't to be.

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  8. Such great advice in this post! I haven't had a long distance relationship but when Shannon was doing FIFO for a bit we definitely did the talk every day. A call in the afternoon to talk about our days before we have dinner was the best times of our day. We decided to continue this by sitting down for 5-10 mins when we both get home from work and just chat for a bit instead of doing our own things. It's nice :)

    Kate | themintedblog.com

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