Wednesday, 2 December 2015


Why are they always so high of ourselves?!

I am going to be completely honest with you here and tell you about the expectations I had of myself for this pregnancy and how ridiculous I now realise they are.

Little baby belly update ;)

I would still exercise exactly how I was with just adjusting the weight.

I honestly thought this would be the case. I really did. After suffering from extreme fatigue for at least the first 8 weeks of my pregnancy, I tried and tried to be that fit pregnant chick that everyone would be in awe of because "OMG she is still exercising and she is pregnant, how amazing is she"....Not the case at all. Sure, I still go to the gym and I do as much as I can to the best of my ability, honestly, it hasn't been that much. Most of the time I go with all intentions to have an awesome workout and 10 minutes in and I'm sitting on the floor sipping water and watching Ben workout.

I try, I really do.. but you have to realise, just because someone else is doing it, doesn't mean you can.  After seeing a few celeb trainers and instagram personalities being super active during their pregnancies (some even running damn marathons), I thought, well why can't I do that too.... well... because every pregnancy is different. I barely have the energy to stay awake at my desk at work let alone get in a full blown workout. You have to listen to your own body and know what you can and can't do. I haven't done weighted squats or dead lifts (my two favourite workouts) in weeks and I do miss them but it just wasn't plausible for me. I've had back and hip issues in the past due to a car accident I was in in 2008 and with all the hormones running though your body, it loosens up all of your joints which makes it easier to get injured. I didn't want to risk it as with every squat I did, I could feel a pain in my hip so I decided to stop (i.e Ben demanded I stop the second I told him it was hurting).

All of my workouts are now just body weight and I'll do the occasional upper body workout with Ben on days I have bulk energy and sometimes I even make myself do half an hour of cardio. That has to be a really good day for me to get that in.

Until very recently, I felt so horrible for not being able to do all the things I wanted to do but what it comes down to is my health and my baby's safety. If my body can't do something, it's not a time to push it. It's hard to accept but there's more on the line now than being that fit chick and caring what everyone else thinks.

I would hardly put on any weight and be "all belly" 

Haha... honestly don't know what I was thinking with this one. I've put on at least one million kg in my breasts alone. Ok I've only put on 5kg in total at 20 weeks which is healthy but with the lack of workouts, my body doesn't look as lean/ fit as it did pre pregnancy and I actually feel like I've lost a little of my booty - I must work on that with some extra body weight stuff asap!

Seriously though, who cares how much weight you put on. If you're eating what you should be eating and giving your body the nutrients it needs without going ridiculously overboard, then don't feel bad about putting on some weight.

I would eat so damn healthy every single day

Well.. I try. I really do BUT (there's always a but), it's not always easy to eat the things you should. Most of the time, I do eat healthy but I'll get half way through a meal and all of a sudden be repulsed by what I'm eating and just stop. For me its not going overboard but going a bit under-board due to food aversions AND I've had no cravings to help me out with eating additional foods.  I get in as much chicken, rice, bread, veggies, fruit & salad as I can (even though most of the time Ben has to force me to eat). You just have to do your best. We can't all be perfect organic and clean eaters 100% of the time, as much as I would like to be (jokes, Nutella).

I would have a giant belly

I feel like its the "craze/popular thing" these days to have a small belly and barely show until your last few weeks (well that's how you get in the news and gain millions of followers on instagram anyway). I wanted a HUGE belly from the second I fell pregnant.. I've been waiting and waiting and I've only just started to pop a little but most days he's positioned so far back, you can't even tell. Still not everyone in my office realises I'm pregnant and I surprise them on days I wear a fitting dress and he's out a little more. Bring on the big belly so everyone knows I am actually pregnant and not just letting myself go!

I would be happy every day

Cue pregnancy hormones. Cue life problems. Cue work issues. Cue anything... and that dream is down the drain when you're pregnant. I feel like I have absolutely NO control over my emotions whatsoever and the littlest things will set me off, good or bad. Today for instance... I finished a whole meal of chicken and salad and I was so proud of myself for feeling full I had tears in my eyes. The hormones make it incredibly hard to deal with difficult situations which I have been put in in the last few months.  Having a support network and actually talking about what you are feeling is IMPERATIVE to feeling ok. I tried bottling it up and pretending to be happy for so long, I literally broke down. Talk to your partner or if you're in this alone, nominate a friend or family member as your support person and spill everything to them. It's important for your health. Depression in pregnancy is a real thing and more and more women are dealing with it due to the stress of everyday life and the new pressure of impending motherhood.

I've really learned over the last week or so to let go of the things I cannot control and just let things happen and do the best I can do for me and my baby. I know I'll be an amazing mumma and being tired and hating on chicken does not change that.

I hope you enjoyed the read... I feel like I needed to write this for myself and.. for anyone else who may be feeling this way!

Keep smiling!

Tahana <3